


Affinity

by WakeOfDelight



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: And instead they will find an opportunity to talk, Basically a Semi-AU where Amon and Kaneki didn't fight during Kanou's lab arc, Because we all know the Amoneki talk is very much needed in canon, Eventual Fluff, Fluff and Angst, How does one title..., M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, There will be a lot of blushing hee
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-15
Updated: 2016-09-11
Packaged: 2018-05-01 16:27:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 15,988
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5212754
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WakeOfDelight/pseuds/WakeOfDelight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Amon was starting to think that a little bit of luck was on his side, that this was perhaps another granted chance to do what he had wished for, for a long time now. </p><p>And if unknown circumstances had made it possible, he wasn't going to let it go.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So hey, I'm finally posting this. Just a quick note: English isn't my first language, so if you spot any mistakes in this, please let me know!

Amon recognized the kagune as soon as he entered the large room.

Attached to his lower back, there was another type of kagune he’d never seen before, slowly disintegrating into the air.

But he did know that _rinkaku_ kagune very well.

_Eyepatch._

For a second, he’d almost doubted himself due to the change in his appearance.

His hair, which used to be jet-black like his, was now a striking white, currently blood-spattered. Crimson against white. This wasn’t the first time he saw it, but the change was still somewhat unsettling. Though, it wasn’t only his hair. Unknown kagune aside, since that time at Aogiri’s hideout Amon had the impression there was something quite different in him, something that he couldn’t put his finger on, that made the memory he retained of the dark-haired ghoul seem really distant.

The acrid smell of blood was heavy in the air; around them, disfigured corpses and limbs were scattered across the floor, creating a gruesome sight. Was Eyepatch responsible for this?

Amon came to a halt. Akira was standing to his side, watching the scene before them with wide eyes. Unlike Suzuya, whose big eyes were excited and bright as if this was the best thing he’d ever witnessed.

In a trance, Amon watched as Shinohara lifted his quinque to deliver the last blow to Eyepatch’s limp body on the ground; blood was soaking almost every inch of his clothes and matted his hair, but he was still breathing. Barely.

Two more seconds and Eyepatch would be dead.

That realization snapped him back to reality.

“Wait! Shinohara-san!” the words were out before he could hold them back. He ran over to where the older man was standing.

Before Shinohara could do anything, his head turned towards Amon. He looked at him with surprise; a clear indication that his superior hadn’t even been aware of them until now.

“Amon?”

“Are you going to kill Eye– this ghoul?” Amon inquired when he reached the other man and Eyepatch’s still body. He looked a lot worse up close, even if he was lying face down.

It was a dumb question, but he needed to gain time in some way.

He needed to think of something to prevent it.

The man blinked. “Of course. He’s still alive, you should step away.” He motioned to him to move aside.

Amon didn’t budge. “But shouldn’t we take him to Cochlea instead?”

“He’s really dangerous, Amon. Did you see his kagune? And his face? You just have to take a look at this place,” he gestured around them. “This ghoul is a kakuja. He’s still incomplete, but this is when and where we put a stop to him before he gets out of control even more. Now, move away,” Shinohara ordered.

“But–”

“What’s the matter, First Class Amon?” It was Akira. She and Suzuya had strolled over to join them.

“I just believe that it’s better if we bring this ghoul to Cochlea instead of killing him,” Amon answered truthfully. He’d been wanting to talk with Eyepatch ever since that night. Amon wanted the ghoul to tell him why he’d cried and let him go. It didn’t make any sense and he needed answers.

“Amon. He _is_ dangerous and unstable. We can’t keep him alive. I’m not going to repeat myself again. We need to be done with this before he regains his strength.” Shinohara’s patience was running out.

“Oh oh oh! Can I do it? _Please_ , Shinohara-san? ~” Suzuya piped up, eyes shining.

“No Juuzou,” he said, massaging his temples. “Now can everyone–”

A low growl came from below them, interrupting Shinohara mid-sentence. Eyepatch started to move, trying to get back to his feet.

“Everyone! Step away!” Shinohara shouted, raising his quinque once more.

Amon opened his mouth to say something, anything, to stop Shinohara, but it wasn’t necessary. In the blink of an eye, a red tentacle emerged from Eyepatch’s bare back, snatching the quinque away from Shinohara’s grasp and sending it flying across the room. It made a clinking sound that echoed within the walls when it hit the floor.

Jason in hand, Suzuya was ready to attack Eyepatch while the ghoul was still down, but without a warning the ghoul emitted a piercing scream as more limbs of his kagune sprouted from his body, along with that same type of kagune Amon had seen moments ago. _His kakuja,_ he reminded himself _._ As soon as Eyepatch got back to his feet, his body gave a sudden, violent jerk. And soon, his kagune was dragging him across the room; it was as if he wasn’t in control of his own body anymore.

Suzuya laughed like a little kid as he chased him, trying to slice the limbs off his kagune or make contact to his body. However, Eyepatch was much faster. With an agile movement of his kagune, he hit one of the walls surrounding them, destroying it instantly and making pieces of concrete fall before them. Amon instinctively closed his eyes to protect them from the debris. A second later, he cracked one eye open and he’d only the time to see Eyepatch fleeing from there. He smashed one of the walls once again creating a path to escape, and within the next second he disappeared from his sight.

So, he wouldn’t get his answers again. Even with that letdown, Amon was strangely relieved Eyepatch had managed to get away from there. Though he was certain the ghoul would not get very far, considering the magnitude of his injuries.

When the smoke dissipated completely, Amon looked around. Akira was removing the dust from her blazer, frowning. Suzuya, on the other hand, looked deeply disappointed. He was pouting.

“Can I go after him, _please please?”_

“No.” Amon told him and then he looked over at Shinohara. He swallowed hard. “Shinohara-san, I’m really so–”

“Save it,” Shinohara snapped, voice sharp. He sighed loudly and his voice softened slightly. “I have no idea why you did it Amon but what’s done is done. We can’t do anything about it.”

Guilt and shame washed over Amon. He’d truly screwed it up. His duty as a ghoul investigator came first; it came before any naïve, personal wish. Suzuya was right. They should go after him. Surely Eyepatch didn’t get far, not in that weakened condition. He opened his mouth to voice his thoughts to his superior, but Shinohara spoke up again.

“We’re retreating,” he announced, deactivating his Arata armor.

His tone didn’t leave room for any disagreements.

Amon closed his mouth.

* * *

 

How could he have been so careless?

Amon touched his neck again, in hopes he was probably mistaken, but it was useless. His cross necklace was missing. He reprimanded himself for not noticing before. Now that he did, he felt beyond uncomfortable without it.

He hesitated. They still weren’t out of Kanou’s mansion. Amon could go back following the route they used and try to find the necklace; it shouldn’t be an impossible task.

Akira noted Amon was falling behind. She looked back, noticing his struggle.

“Is everything alright, First Class Amon?” She asked.

“I… I forgot something,” he murmured dubiously, not really wanting to tell Akira what he’d actually lost. After all, how could he explain he lost something the man, who he had once placed his trust in and thought of as a father figure, gave him? Something he definitely shouldn’t be keeping anymore... But it was a reminder of those days and it mattered. “Please stay here, I’ll be back.” He didn’t wait for a response.

Gripping the holds of his suitcase tightly, Amon went back through the same path they came from, inspecting the floor thoroughly.  It wasn’t something easy to do since he needed to hurry up to not worry his partner and superior.  

After five minutes or so, he’d newly arrived to the hallway that had led them to Kanou’s experimentation lab. This was dangerous; he couldn’t have a way to know if the ghouls they’d fought with earlier were still inside.

Amon was about to give up, thinking a necklace wasn’t worth risking his life, and return when he spotted a few steps ahead a familiar object on the ground. His necklace. Amon couldn’t believe his luck.

He breathed out a sigh of relief and went to retrieve it, bending down to grab it. He clutched the necklace in his hand as if to make sure it was the real thing. Amon turned to go, but the faint sound that reached his ears so sudden made him stop in his tracks.

Whatever it was it sounded like voices.

Listening more carefully, Amon realized it was a single voice and it was definitely male.

Uneasiness began to stir in the pitch of his stomach. It was like whoever was talking, was doing it to themselves. The words were unintelligible and they were gradually becoming more unclear and desperate as Amon’s feet took him towards the source. Glancing around, he never let his guard down and prepared for any possible attack.

As soon as he turned around a random corner, and without a warning, the sounds turned so violent and so loud it almost made him jolt. It sounded like someone was slamming something against a wall, hard and relentlessly.

_“GET OUT OF MY HEAD!”_

What the–

Amon followed the noise, heart pounding in his ears, until he reached a narrow passage and froze, not really trusting his own eyes to what he was seeing before him.

Eyepatch was banging his head against the wall over and over.  Amon immediately recognized his white hair and the bloodied black clothes he’d been wearing.

“I SAID GET OUT!” He roared.

Eyes widen, Amon wasn’t sure how to react or what to do. Eyepatch stopped hurting himself and walked away from the wall, clutching his hair tightly with both hands, until his back bumped with the wall on the other side and let himself drop on the floor. He brought his shaking legs towards his body and hid his face. Small, breathy sounds were coming from him. Still confused, Amon realized he was sobbing.

“Please, please, leave me alone. This is my body, please, just leave me the fuck alone!” He pleaded to no one in particular with a broken voice.

Too shocked to do anything, Amon jumped in surprise when he heard Akira’s clear voice through the communicator.

_“First Class Amon? Amon, can you hear me?”_

Eyepatch’s head snapped in direction of the sound, finally becoming aware of his presence. They locked eyes, though Eyepatch’s were bloodshot and he seemed to have problems focusing on him. But amidst his confusion, Amon realized it was the first time he saw Eyepatch without the fake grinning-mouth mask he remembered all too well.

Beneath both dried and fresh tears, dirt, and blood, he saw the face of a young man, a boy, even. His eyes were dark and big. White hair and bangs framed a face with slightly round, pale cheeks. Amon was expecting Eyepatch to be young if he considered his built. But not awfully young. Perhaps eighteen or nineteen, but he couldn’t be more than twenty.

But neither his apparent youth, nor seeing him hurting himself in such a savage way, left him as speechless as taking in the sight of his eyes. Mismatched eyes were staring fixedly at him. His kakugan, his kakugan was only showing in his left eye. How was that even possible? In all his years as an investigator, not once he’d seen something like this before, nor had he known of ghouls whose kakugan displayed in a single eye.

Except for the One-Eyed King.

_“Amon? Amon, answer me.”_

Amon recovered from his stupor and answered slowly, trying to not make any loud noises that could scare Eyepatch off. “I’m here, Akira. I’m fine. I’ll go back in a minute.” He waited for Akira’s mildly annoyed response and turned the communicator off.

Eyepatch was still regarding him with an unreadable expression. The ghoul watched, unblinking, as Amon approached him cautiously.

“Eyepatch? Do you recognize me?” Amon asked warily. “I’m not going to hurt you.” He promised.

Amon didn’t know why he said that. What he should be doing is knocking Eyepatch unconscious and taking him to Cochlea, where he belonged. This ghoul had been responsible, albeit indirectly, for his mentor’s death, he reminded himself bitterly. Eyepatch seemed lost, as though he was still recovering from the things that were going through his mind moments ago. This was the perfect opportunity to take him to the ghoul prison and fix his mistake from earlier.

Amon set his briefcase on the floor and crouched down so he was in Eyepatch’s eye level, a few steps away from him.

That seemed to bring the ghoul out of his trance. He finally spoke in a small, brittle voice. “P-please, make them leave. They’re still inside of my head, please please.” He started sobbing again.

Amon was unsure on how to approach this situation. Eyepatch looked really bad; something was definitely haunting him, haunting his mind and inflicting him pain. But this had nothing to do with him. Eyepatch was still a ghoul. Someone whom he should kill.

That’s what Amon said to himself. Then, why was he raising a hand towards him? Why didn’t he shove Eyepatch away when the ghoul scooted closer to him and with a trembling hand fisted the front of his suit? Why did he place a hand on Eyepatch’s back and began moving it in small circles slowly across his trembling back instead, as the ghoul hid his face in his chest?

Desire for answers or not, none of this made sense to Amon. Still, he didn’t move and neither did Eyepatch. Eventually, the ghoul’s low sobs died down.

Amon looked down at him and noticed Eyepatch was actually no longer conscious. Not only that, there were still wounds on his body that hadn’t healed yet; it looked like he was still bleeding in some parts.

“-neki-kun. I’m sure I caught the smell of his blood this way, Banjoi-san.” A male voice said not so far away. Amon held his breath.

“You surely know that,” a second male voice growled. His tone shifted to one of concern. “But if you can smell his blood, then he’s definitely hurt or something, we must hurry up, maybe he needs our help.”

Amon heard steps growing closer second by second, along with the voices. He now recognized the first one as the Gourmet’s. They were definitely looking for Eyepatch. Amon hastily searched for a piece of paper within his suit and something he could write with. He quickly scribbled down a place, date and time. Amon didn’t have time to consider if this was actually a terrible idea or not. But he needed to talk with Eyepatch soon, and if this way was his only chance, he would take it. He tucked the note into one of the pockets in Eyepatch’s shorts.

Amon took off his suit jacket and used it to cover Eyepatch’s back, so blood didn’t smudge his own clothes. He then grabbed his legs and shoulders and lifted him, holding him firmly against his chest; Eyepatch was surprisingly light and felt so small in his arms. The voices were almost here. Inhaling deeply, Amon stepped out of the passage and found himself face to face with the Gourmet ghoul, who, luckily for him, was still wearing his mask. There were another four ghouls, whom Amon vaguely remembered seeing earlier. One was really tall with broad shoulders and an unusual type of beard adorning his chin. The other three had all gas masks covering their faces. They all stared at the unconscious form in his arms. Amon didn’t need to see their faces to know they were bewildered. Nobody say a thing for a moment.

Then the ghoul with the beard gave two steps forward, hands clenching into fists; his expression was now one of rage. “What are you–”

Amon held a hand up, signaling he meant no harm. “I’m not here to pick a fight. I’ll only leave Eye… him with you. He’s only unconscious and his wounds haven’t healed yet but I don’t think it’s serious.”

Gourmet and the bearded ghoul shared a quick, hesitant glance, as though they were assessing if Amon was telling the truth. Too late, the latter realized his face was uncovered. His face paled and a look of horror passed over his features.

“I won’t say anything about this or you. If you keep yourselves out of the CCG’s way, the chances to be out of danger are definitely higher but I can’t promise anything. Although, I can guarantee I won’t report any of this.” Amon hoped that would be enough. He really needed to get back. This was taking too long. It had been at least fifteen minutes since the last time he talked with Akira and she, or worse, all of them could come back to look for him pretty soon.

With one last dubious glance at the Gourmet, the bearded ghoul stepped closer with some apprehension and Amon closed the distance. He carefully placed Eyepatch’s unmoving body into the other’s arms without retrieving his jacket. He would think of something if Akira or the others asked him about it. Though in that moment, his mind chose to focus on the unexpected and unpleasant lack of warmth in his arms.

“Stay here for another ten minutes, until I and my companions leave this place.” With that, Amon turned around.

“Why are you doing this?” Amon heard one of them ask behind him. He didn’t look back to know it had been the bearded ghoul the one who’d spoken.

“Because I owe him,” Amon answered after a short pause. He recalled once again their first encounter, when Eyepatch had begged him, with tears filling his eyes, to leave, to not make him a murderer. He’d spared his life that night, for reasons Amon could hardly comprehend to this date. But it wasn’t only because of that. He strongly desired to speak with him. And inside Cochlea’s walls wasn’t the best place to do so.

Amon silently hoped Eyepatch would see his note.

Without another word, he walked off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! ｡◕ ‿ ◕｡
> 
> A few things:  
> \- I'm pretty much new to writing but I hope this wasn't too OOC.  
> \- Ik I'm writing another fic but I really really wanted to write Amoneki ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯  
> \- I took some liberties with this, I made a few changes and added a few things/details from the anime.  
> \- Aaand, I'll say it now, I won't focus too much on the CCG's side (I mean, no more than the necessary) because honestly, I don't even remember half of the names and if you happen to know me from my Tumblr, my dislike for the CCG isn't a surprise, so there's that.
> 
> Any kind of suggestions, (nice) comments, etc are very welcome! <3


	2. Chapter 2

Kaneki stared at the piece of paper in his hand, reading it for what it seemed the hundredth time.

_Please meet me at this café next Friday._

_12 pm._

It was signed with ‘A.K.’, and then the investigator had written down the address of the café in a really rushed handwriting.

Friday… That was today. There were still a few hours left for the time the dove had settled. And he still wasn’t sure if it was a good idea to go; he didn’t want to put in danger the lives of those close to him.

To begin with, Kaneki didn’t even know what A.K. stood for. He didn’t know the dove’s name. However, the memory of their fight all those months ago was still very fresh, and even that time at Aogiri, when they’d seen each other for a brief moment. But this time, what happened at Kanou’s lab, not so much. He had a vague recollection of that.

Though, he did remember the moment he lost all control.

And as well as the pain in multiple places in his body, the sound of different voices near him and… Rize’s and Yamori’s mocking voices resounding within his head.

After that, his memories turned even blurrier. Or at least most of them; the image of a shadow taking the form of a tall, young man entering his field of view was still clear. He’d faintly recognized him as the dove from that rainy night. The man had spoken to him but he wasn’t able to focus on the words, on what he was saying, it was like he had been underwater. And then, nothing. His memories were still foggy.

The investigator must have helped him for some reason, because the next time he opened his eyes he was in Banjou’s arms, on their way home. That and the now clean and ironed suit jacket hanging on the doorknob were confirmation of that. It was hard to believe that a _ghoul_ investigator would let a ghoul live, let alone help him. But it did happen somehow; otherwise he would be long dead.

Kaneki walked over to the jacket and brought the garment to his nose. Despite the smell of detergent coming from it since it had been washed already, it still smelled faintly of that investigator. It was a scent that he remembered too well. After all, he’d been the first human Kaneki had willingly taken a bite of; the first and last time he tasted human flesh. He closed his eyes, recalling the delectable flavor.

Maybe, just maybe, what he’d told the dove the time they fought had stirred some doubt, or at least had some kind of effect in him. Kaneki guessed what the dove wanted was to talk. And if that was the case, he couldn’t waste this chance.

There was still the possibility the whole thing could be a trap though, but sometimes you just got to take some kind of risks.

* * *

 

“Onii-chan, can you help me reading this?” Hinami asked from her spot on the kitchen table. She glanced up, taking in his clothes. “Oh. Are you going out, onii-chan?”

“Sorry, Hinami-chan,” Kaneki answered, giving her a small smile. “I’ll help you when I come back, is that fine with you?”

“Sure!” She gave an enthusiastic nod and smiled brightly. “Where are you going?”

“I… uh… I’m going to meet someone,” he replied with some doubt. Kaneki considered lying, but it was only Hinami.

“Ohhh, is it a date?” Her smile widened and she giggled.

“What? No, it isn’t like–”

“Don’t worry onii-chan! I won’t tell Banjou-san or Flower Man anything about it!” She put her fingers over her mouth, miming a zip across her lips.

“But it really isn’t–” He stopped himself. Really, dates were the last thing Kaneki wanted to find himself involved with. But better to let Hinami believe that rather than having her know he was actually possibly heading – _willingly_ – to his own death. And he didn’t want neither Banjou nor Tsukiyama to find out what he intended to do.

Back in his room, Kaneki had wondered if he should bring his mask with him. But he’d discarded the thought. It was daytime, the arranged place was a café, and the dove had seen him without it already anyway.  It seemed pointless now. The only thing he was taking with him was the investigator’s jacket, neatly folded in a small bag.

He changed his sentence. “Can you do that for me, Hinami-chan?”

She nodded energetically again.

“Thank you.” He smiled. “I’ll get back in a couple of hours.”

“Good luck, onii-chan!” She giggled again.

* * *

 

Amon glanced down at this watch.  There were less than five minutes left.

Eyepatch should show up any moment now. That if he actually found his note _and_ didn’t throw it away. He wasn’t even sure if he would come, but it was worth a try. And Amon really didn’t want to admit it but he was feeling a little bit nervous, not to mention anxious. He could tell by the way he was bouncing his leg relentlessly.

What would he tell him? Did Eyepatch remember what happened at Kanou’s mansion? What if he never showed up and lost his only opportunity to talk to him? Or worse, what if everything the ghoul told him were merely lies, only to–

“Sir.” A female voice called near him.  “Sir, are you alright?” Amon looked up. A woman, whom he recognized as one of the waitresses in the café, was standing before him; her young face displayed worry.

He cleared his throat. “Yes. Thank you for your concern.”

“Can I bring you something?” She asked politely.

“I’m actually waiting for someone. I’d rather wait for that person to arrive.”

“There’s no need for that.” A soft voice spoke suddenly. Amon’s gaze shifted from the waitress to the voice and he was suddenly staring at Eyepatch’s face. He felt his eyes widen slightly.

With his attention focused on the conversation with the woman, he hadn’t even noticed the moment he arrived. Although, now that he was really seeing Eyepatch up close, he didn’t look very tall. If it weren’t for his unusual hair color, the ghoul would’ve probably passed unnoticed most of the time.

“Is this the person you’ve been waiting for?” The waitress asked, smiling softly.

“... Yes,” he answered, his gaze unwavering on the ghoul. He looked back at the woman and nodded. “Yes, it is.”

“I’ll leave you then. When you’re ready to order something, don’t hesitate in calling me.” She smiled once more and left.

Amon returned his dark eyes to Eyepatch’s slim figure. He was wearing a simple outfit, just dark- gray jeans and a plain, black t-shirt. So normal and so different from the weird-looking black clothes he was clad in a week ago. The only thing standing out, besides the hair, was the black eye-patch conveniently hiding the eye where his single kakugan manifested. He also noticed his eyes –or should he say eye– were gray. Not too far from the shade of color as his own. There were dark circles under them, so noticeable against his pale skin. Amon noticed he was carrying a bag in one of his hands.

Now that he had the ghoul in front of him, he didn’t know where to start; his mind was blank.

“Good afternoon investigator,” the boy greeted in a polite voice. Eyepatch appeared to be calm, but Amon sensed a bit of uneasiness and apprehension irradiating from him.

Amon greeted him back and gestured to the seat opposite to him. “Please, sit.”

The ghoul complied, sitting down across from him, not before eyeing the briefcase by Amon’s feet with slight distrust.

“I wasn’t sure if you would come,” Amon started.

“Neither was I.” His lips curled up just barely. “I actually decided it today. But I figured you only wanted to talk. And… since you helped me or at least I think you did, I… I guess I wanted to know why. To be honest, I don’t remember much.” He frowned, looking down at his hands.

So, he didn’t remember. Amon couldn’t help but wonder how much exactly he did recall from then.

“I paid you back,” he said. At that, the ghoul looked up at him with clear surprise in his visible eye.

“You paid me back? For what? I’m not sure I understand–”

“The world is wrong, isn’t it?” Amon repeated his own words from that night several months ago.

Realization dawned on Eyepatch’s young features and muttered an understanding sound.

“Yeah, about that, that’s why I also came today. But before anything, may I ask your name investigator?”

“Amon. Amon Koutarou.” He replied after a moment. Amon wasn’t quite fond on the idea of giving his name to a ghoul, but it surely wasn’t as dangerous as the ghoul telling him _his_ name.  And Eyepatch knew that. All ghouls knew. But Amon wasn’t expecting Eyepatch to answer back without any hint of hesitance.

“I’m Kaneki Ken.” He extended his hand across the table.

Amon felt a little taken aback at the formal gesture before a feeling of satisfaction settled in him; after months of wanting to know who this ghoul was, he at least finally knew Eyepatch’s name.

He held out his hand and grabbed Eyepatch’s, shaking it firmly. His skin felt cold against his, but it wasn’t unpleasant.

 _Kaneki Ken_.

Amon thought it was a nice name. However, he hadn’t realized he’d voiced that thought aloud until he saw Eyepatch blink; his eye widened slightly conferring him a more innocent look.

His hand stilled.

Eyepatch looked down at their joined hands and then up at him. “Amon-san?”

Kaneki. Kaneki Ken. This was…

It all clicked in his mind; the flashback, from only some weeks ago, immediately came back to him.

The time when Shinohara explained the Binge Eater’s possible connection with Kanou Akihiro and the unfortunate university student that mad doctor had probably transplanted the female ghoul’s kakuhou into. Amon was sure the name of that student had been Kaneki Ken. Nagachika had even claimed he was his best friend.

“You are…” Amon looked at him with shock.

Confusion was all over Eyepatch’s, _no_ , Kaneki Ken’s face.

The sudden vibration coming from his phone in his pocket pulled him out of his stupefaction. He abruptly released Kaneki’s hand and mumbled a quick apology, standing up to answer the call. He abandoned the place for privacy as well for the need of fresh air.

“Hello?”

 _“Amon.”_ Akira’s voice reached him from the other side. _“I know you’re in your break, but you need to get back. There’s a case…”_

Amon half-listened to what Akira was saying, still too bewildered to concentrate on her partner’s words. Once Akira finished, he murmured a positive answer and ended the call. In short, he needed to head back to the CCG. He ran a hand over his face in frustration.

This ended too soon. Amon still hadn’t asked Eyepatch anything.

He went back inside the café, realizing too late that he’d left his briefcase under the table. _Such a stupid mistake._ Even if this boy was who Amon was sure he was, he was still a ghoul and he couldn’t afford to make this kind of mistakes, mistakes that could literally get him killed.

Once inside the small place, he glanced over at their table. Kaneki wasn’t alone; he was talking to the waitress from earlier. Amon watched as the woman said something that made Kaneki shake his head immediately, making her laugh quietly and if his eyes weren’t deceiving him, Amon caught a glimpse of red lightly dusting the boy’s cheeks as if he was embarrassed.  

Amon headed towards them, but before he could reach the table, the waitress nodded at something Kaneki said and left him.

“Sorry about that. I wasn’t expecting a call.” Amon apologized once he was next to him.

Kaneki glanced up at him. “Amon-san.” He sounded surprised. “It’s fine. You need to go, right?”

Amon looked at him sharply. “How did you–”

Kaneki stood up then, pointing at one of his ears, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to listen.” He looked a little bit ashamed.

Result of a mad experiment or not, Amon didn’t know if it were the ridiculously normal clothes or Kaneki’s calm, polite way to talk or his incredibly human reactions, that made him momentarily forget he was treating with a ghoul. But this boy before him, who barely reached his shoulders, was a murderer. And the slaughter at the Ghoul Restaurant and Kanou’s lab were proof of that. Even if the victims had been all ghouls, Eyepatch was still a killer. Amon must never forget that.

Amon let out a sigh. “There’s no need to apologize. That was certainly my fault. I should’ve remembered.”

Kaneki nodded, not really convinced. “By the way, I bought you a coffee. I didn’t know what kind you like so I just ordered it black. You can always pour cream in it and add sugar if you want. I hope that’s okay.”

Amon was so taken aback at the kind action it took him a moment to reply. “You shouldn’t have.” 

“It really is nothing. Even if you said you paid me back, I still want to thank you in some way. For helping me, I mean.” He met his gaze.

There was no doubt this ghoul was constantly surprising him, always doing the unexpected. Amon wasn’t completely okay with the situation but he didn’t want to argue. Besides, he needed to return to the CCG as soon as possible.

“I see. Then I’ll accept the coffee.”

Kaneki gave him a small, relieved smile.

Amon started to walk towards the counter to grab the coffee the waitress had just placed on the wooden surface. “But next time, you’ll let me pay for your coffee,” Amon said automatically, then he realized what he’d said and looked back at the ghoul.

Kaneki looked confused before he caught on the expression Amon had. “Oh, actually I can drink coffee.” At Amon’s puzzlement he added, “I’ll explain next time.” Kaneki thanked the woman behind the counter, who smiled at both of them and wished them a good day.

On their way out, Amon made a pause to pour a whole lot of cream and even more sugar into his coffee. He heard Kaneki made a sound of amusement from behind him.

“So, investigator, is it okay for you if we meet here again on Sunday at the same time? Is it your day off?”

“That sounds good to me, Kaneki.” It was the first time he said the ghoul’s name out loud; it rolled off his tongue with ease. Kaneki’s slight change in expression told him he had realized it too.

“Then it’s settled. And Amon-san?” Kaneki handed him the bag he’d been carrying. Amon accepted it with confusion. “Thank you. It’s your suit jacket,” he explained. “Have a good day, investigator.” Kaneki bowed his head, leaving Amon startled once more at how respectful and thoughtful the ghoul was. Such a striking contrast with what he was and what he did. Before he could answer, Kaneki turned on his feet and started walking in the opposite direction.

Amon watched the slender figure and bright hair until he could no longer see it amidst the crowd of people.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for taking so long to upload this chapter! tbh, it was done since some time ago but I still needed to give it a last check and fix some things and I hadn't had the time to do it. But now that I'm on winter break, surely it will take less time to update.
> 
> By the way, I wasn't sure about Amon's eye color? In all the manga official art his eyes seem black/dark, in the anime they're dark gray (similar to Ken's) but then I've seen people say they're (dark) blue? So I don't know what's the truth lol, sorry about that. Anyway, in the end I decided to just go with the anime version.
> 
> Thanks for reading! If you see any mistakes, let me know!


	3. Chapter 3

The following day Amon was in one of the main offices, typing on the computer keyboard what he was looking for.

He pressed enter and the Binge Eater’s data displayed on the screen. There wasn’t a picture available but there was information on the ghoul’s occasional sightings and latest attacks, as well as a brief description on the Binge Eater’s victim preferences. According to it, she usually went after attractive young males, alluring them to ultimately feed on them.

He gave a last look at the ghoul’s file and then he typed _“Eyepatch”_ in the search box. His index finger tapped against the desk while he waited for the data to load.

When it did, it wasn’t a surprise to not find a picture. It wasn’t a surprise, either, the few information available in the file. Eyepatch’s first appearance was that time Amon had fought with him in November from last year.

The information also mentioned Eyepatch’s possible connection with Rabbit. And the last line in the text talked about the ghoul’s unknown whereabouts.

Amon closed the tab and leaned back against the chair, sighing. After seeing Kaneki’s unusual eyes and along with this information, he finally knew the truth. Binge Eater had to be the same girl who died in the steel beam accident last October and whose organs were transplanted into Kaneki Ken, turning him into a ghoul. _No. Not exactly that_ , Amon decided after remembering his single kakugan.

The investigator couldn’t wait for their meeting the next day. Yes, his main question had been answered, but he had a lot more that he hoped Kaneki would answer.

Amon glanced at his wrist watch and realized it was now lunch time. He stood up with the idea of asking Shinohara if he wished to come along when he bumped into someone as soon as he stepped out of the room.

Amon tried to grab the other person to prevent the fall but failed.

“Ouch!”

They must have been carrying something because a poster also landed on the floor, in a way that Amon caught a glimpse of its content, leaving him momentarily baffled, but he recovered fast.

“I’m really sorry!” Amon quickly extended a hand to help the other person. “Nagachika,” he said with surprise when he saw who it was.

“Whoa, that hurt, Amon-san,” Nagachika said and grabbed Amon’s hand, getting back to his feet.

“I’m so sorry, Nagachika. I wasn’t paying attention.”

The boy only let out a short laugh. “I’m just kidding! You don’t have to apologize. I wasn’t looking either.”

Amon nodded as Nagachika picked up the object, rolling it again.

The investigator didn’t hold back, he had to ask. “Was that… your missing friend?”

He couldn’t see Nagachika’s expression because his back was facing him, but after a pause he answered. “Yeah, that’s him.”

“Do you mind if I take a look?”

Another pause.

Nagachika turned around and nodded. “Not at all. Here.” He handed him the poster.

Amon thanked him and unrolled it. On the top of it, there was a single word in red that said “Missing”. Amon gazed down and he was now looking at Kaneki Ken. His name was below the picture along with the last time he was seen and contact information.

The most noticeable difference between the picture and the boy he saw yesterday was the hair. He almost looked the same, except for the expression. He was smiling openly in the picture and there were no prominent dark circles under his eyes. The expression was completely different from the one the ghoul wore the day before.

While Kaneki was polite and even smiled a little during their meeting, there had been a constant sadness in his features. It wasn’t something strange considering Kaneki turned into a flesh-eating monster against his will, but something told Amon there was more to it. 

He looked back at Nagachika. “Were you going to place this somewhere?”

“Yeah, I was actually on my way out. I just came to deliver a message to Akira-san.”

“I was also on my way out to have lunch. If you’re not busy, would you like to join me? My treat,” Amon asked him.  He wished the other would agree. Amon wanted to know more about Kaneki before their meeting soon.

Nagachika looked at him for a few seconds with an unreadable expression that quickly changed when a smile settled on his face. “Sure.”

* * *

 

“Please, order whatever you want,” Amon told him once they found two empty seats that could provide them privacy.

Nagachika thanked him and proceeded to order a medium-sized bowl of ramen. Amon ordered the same.

While they waited for the food, the blond asked, “I appreciate the invitation, Amon-san, did you want to talk about something?”

“Actually, I do,” Amon replied. “It’s about your friend, Kaneki Ken.”

“Kaneki, uh? And what do you want to know about him?”

“I’m aware it isn’t any of my business, but have you known him for a long time?”

“Um-hm,” Nagachika hummed, leaning back against the chair and crossing his arms over his chest. He looked thoughtful. “For quite some time. We’ve been best friends since we were both in elementary school. Why do you ask?”

The conversation was briefly interrupted when the food arrived, but Amon answered when they were alone again.

“I guess you could call it curiosity… But it must be difficult to you, isn’t it? Your friend’s sudden disappearance.”

Nagachika glanced down and picked up his chopsticks, stirring up the noodles. “It is.” He talked in a low voice. “I just want to know if he’s okay, you know? I don’t care about anything else.”

Amon stared at him. This was the right moment to tell him about Kaneki. Amon didn’t know Nagachika for too long so he wasn’t sure how he would react at the news that his friend was now a ghoul.

A small part of Amon kept nagging at him at the fact that as a CCG investigator, he shouldn’t be doing this, talking freely about this with Nagachika. But he shouldn’t being drinking coffee with a ghoul, either. It didn’t matter now. He would wish someone did the same if he were in Nagachika’s place; he could leave his facet as a ghoul investigator again.

“Kaneki is okay. You don’t need to worry,” Amon said quietly.

Nagachika looked up immediately, abruptly dropping the chopsticks. At the question in his eyes, Amon assured him, “I saw him yesterday. He’s okay.”

“Is that true?” He asked. Amon detected the relief in his voice. “Where? Where did you see him?”

“In a café in the 5th ward. I told him to meet there.” At that Nagachika arched a brow almost imperceptibly.

Amon continued hastily. “Listen, Nagachika. It isn’t appropriate for a CCG investigator to tell you this, but, I’ve come to the conclusion that you deserve to know.” He lowered his voice even more. “I didn’t know something like this could be possible, but your friend is no longer human.”

Amon stopped, expecting to hear Nagachika say something along the lines of _‘what do you mean?’_ and maybe a confused expression, but he was only met with Nagachika’s indecipherable eyes.

“He’s a ghoul, isn’t he?”

That left Amon certainly perplexed. “Did you always know?”

“Amon-san, before I answer your question, I want to know something. I’ve only recently started working for the CCG, but so far I can tell you’re different from other investigators,” the boy said. “What I want to say is that I’m convinced I can trust you. But I don’t want to be wrong with something that involves Kaneki too. So, _my_ question is, can I do it? Can I really trust you?”

The conversation had taken an unexpected turn, Amon thought.

They stared at each other, unblinking, until Amon shattered the silence. “I promise you I have no intentions in harming your friend, so yes. You can trust me.”

Nagachika studied him for a long moment and his face broke into a sincere smile. “Good.”

* * *

Amon recalled the last thing Nagachika had told him; the look in his eyes when he’d asked him to not say a word about him to Kaneki; that it was enough for him knowing his best friend was okay and he would wait until Kaneki decided to come back.

Nagachika didn’t say anything else and Amon didn’t ask any further. What he did clarify was that he wasn’t sticking posters of Kaneki around the ward, he was actually taking them down, and he happened to find one in the way to the CCG. That’s why he had it when he ran into Amon.

They didn’t talk a lot; the blond left soon after that, with the promise they would talk again.

The growing sound of the subway getting closer second by second brought Amon back to the present.

It came to a screeching halt and Amon got in the subway along the mass of people as soon as the doors opened. Even for a Sunday, the subway was pretty crowded. On the other hand, at least the weather was pleasant.

The ride wasn’t long and soon he reached his destination: the same café from two days ago. Amon wondered if Kaneki was already there. He didn’t know where the ghoul lived, but hopefully it wasn’t very far.

He pushed open the crystal door with one hand, instinctively glancing at same the table from the last time, and found that Kaneki was already there. Although, the ghoul hadn’t noticed him yet, too engrossed in the book he was reading.

The investigator took this opportunity to watch him. After a few seconds, the ghoul’s eyes left the page he was reading, but he didn’t glance in his direction, instead, he looked through the window next to him, probably wondering where he was.

As he watched him, Amon suddenly remembered what he had read the day before, on the Binge Eater’s choice of victims, and he now understood why the female ghoul had set her eyes on Kaneki; the boy really had a pretty face. Daylight filtered through the window bathing his face softly, highlighting the paleness of his skin, and even from the spot he was standing, Amon noted how long his dark eyelashes were, adding to the grayscale of his features: white hair, pale skin and clear, gray eyes.

There was again that same sadness in his gaze that Amon had noticed previously; it left him with the ever growing desire of wanting to know more about him. It was then when Kaneki decided to look in his direction, catching Amon off guard. His uncovered eye widened slightly in recognition before he gave Amon a small smile and put his book aside.

Amon prayed the redness of his face at being caught staring wasn’t awfully evident. He forced himself to walk towards the ghoul.

“Good afternoon, Amon-san,” Kaneki greeted him when the investigator reached the table. Today, the ghoul’s clothes were more formal. He was clad in a white dress shirt and black slacks. Amon himself hadn’t changed much, always wearing his suit. However, he didn’t bring his briefcase this time; a change that he was sure Kaneki had already noticed.

“Hello, Kaneki. Good afternoon. Have you been waiting for a long time?” Amon asked him when he saw a half-empty cup of coffee in front of him. The investigator took his seat.

“Not at all. Although, I did arrive earlier, I wanted to read a bit,” he answered, touching the cover of the book on the table.

“If you don’t mind me asking, what are you reading?” Amon asked, curious, and amazed at the fact that someone who could kill his own kind without mercy liked something so common like reading. _But Kaneki wasn’t born a ghoul_ , he reminded himself.

“It’s just a collection of fantasy tales someone very dear to me gave me some time ago,” Kaneki replied, gazing at the book. His voice was laced with what Amon recognized as fondness. He looked back to him. “Do you like to read, Amon-san?”

“Me? Not really. I don’t have a lot of free time anyway, but even when I do have it, I prefer other things,” Amon answered, a little taken aback at the question.

The investigator didn’t miss the look of disappointment that passed across Kaneki’s face. _He really does like to read._ The realization made him smile.  

Amon heard Kaneki’s voice again. “Then if you don’t mind _me_ asking, what do you like to do?”

Before he could answer, a waitress appeared next to them. 

“Hello.” Amon saw it was the same waitress from two days ago. “I was telling your friend I was glad you’re both visiting us once again.” She smiled at them and the investigator felt like he was missing something. “What can I get for you?”

Amon ignored that and ordered a latte while Kaneki asked for another cup of black coffee.

When she left, Kaneki turned to him. “Are you sure you don’t want anything else?”

Amon nodded. “I’m fine. I had breakfast earlier.” He cleared his throat. “About your question, I like exercising. It keeps my mind occupied. Also I do like to eat, sweets especially.” He always felt like a kid for that, but he couldn’t help it; sweets were his weak spot.

“I think I can say that doesn’t surprise me in the slightest after seeing the amount of sugar you put into your coffee last time.” Kaneki let out a small laugh that quickly hid behind his hand, as if his own reaction had taken him by surprise. “Sorry.”

For Amon, that was possibly an indication that the ghoul didn’t laugh too often.

He smiled in response. “You don’t need to apologize. But you’re right. When it comes to sweet things, I can’t help it.”

Kaneki returned his smile and a comfortable silence fell over them. It was broken, though, when the waitress brought their coffee.

“Kaneki.” Amon said when they were alone. “I know who you actually are and what happened to you.” He said directly.

The boy looked confused but then he seemed to remember something. “Was that why you had that reaction when I told you my name?”

“Yes. We are aware of the accident from last October involving you, the female ghoul we call Binge Eater, and Dr. Kanou Akihiro, who transplanted her organs into you. We know the ghoul is dead, but we’d been trying to find both your and Kanou’s whereabouts all this time.”

Kaneki looked down at his steaming coffee, silent. Amon carried on, “However, we had no idea if transplanting ghoul organs into a human could have some kind of effect in said person. But after seeing you, and especially your eyes, I finally had the answer of the question that had been plaguing me ever since the first time I saw you.” 

Kaneki remained quiet, seemingly lost in thought, but then, “Does anyone else know I’m…”

“Eyepatch?” Kaneki’s mouth twitched up at one corner as if saying _‘is that what you’re calling me?’._ “No, only me.”

Kaneki’s posture visibly relaxed. “Why haven’t you told anyone else?” He looked up, defiant, holding his gaze.

_Because you let me live. Because you don’t kill for pleasure. Because you’re different from other ghouls. Because you’re still human._

_Because I still wish to speak with you._

“Because I’m not sure what measures the CCG would take in your case, Kaneki. This is the first time something like this happens.” That was also true. Amon had no idea how the CCG would act in Kaneki’s special situation. As far as Amon knew, Kaneki hadn’t killed a single human. But the CCG wasn’t going to be so lenient with him, even knowing that.

“But I’m still a ghoul, aren’t I? I’m still a killer,” Kaneki said, but hidden behind those words, Amon heard what Kaneki actually wanted to know: _Why do you care?_

Kaneki was right and Amon knew it. Even if what happened to him hadn’t been his fault, the CCG couldn’t make an exception because it didn’t matter how it happened, Kaneki was a ghoul now; he craved human flesh and that made him a danger to human kind. Amon once thought like that too. His views had definitely changed in the couple of times Amon had seen or talked with Kaneki.

“There’s something you should know about me, Kaneki. I’m firmly in favor of justice. If the CCG overlooks you were originally human and sends you to the ghoul prison, I won’t have a word against that decision.” Amon took a deep breath. “If what you told me the first time we met was true, then you’re not a bad person, Kaneki. You don’t kill humans. Or am I wrong?”

Kaneki averted his gaze, but Amon took his silence as a negative answer. He reached for his latte and took a small sip, making a face instantly. He’d forgotten to add sugar. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Kaneki smiling lightly, not quite looking at him.

“Is there… Is there anything else you want to know?” Amon heard him ask, which was unexpected to the investigator. He never thought the ghoul would be willing to give him the chance to ask anything he wanted to know. Amon felt glad; that meant Kaneki trusted him to some extent.

“Yes, I do actually,” he replied, grabbing the sugar container and adding a few spoonfuls into the cup.  “Why did you disappear so sudden? Was there a particular reason? And why were you at Kanou’s mansion that time?” Amon had so many more questions, but that would have to do for now.

Kaneki brought the cup to his mouth and drank before he looked directly at him. “I realized I had things to do. And I was there for the very same reason as you. I was looking for Kanou. These past months I’d been getting information about his whereabouts. I wanted him to tell me why he turned me into this.” Kaneki’s grip tightened around the cup.

“Did you have luck?”

“I did. And not only that, he intends to keep experimenting on humans and creating more half-ghouls. He’s dangerous.” Kaneki’s voice was strained. “I should have killed him when I had the opportunity.”

 “I don’t know if the CCG has knowledge of it, but he’s working for Aogiri. He even wanted me to join them.” Kaneki snorted. “As if I were crazy enough to work alongside the man who turned me into a monster in order to fulfill his own foolish beliefs,” he said bitterly, shaking his head.   

 _Kanou wanted to create more half-ghouls?_ Amon felt his hand clench into a fist. “With more reason we should’ve found him then. The CCG needs to stop him.”

Kaneki emitted a sound of agreement. “Amon-san,” He called. “I haven’t told you the principal reason I wanted to talk with you since the beginning. I have to get back now, but can we meet again?”

Amon was curious at what the ghoul wanted to tell him and disconcerted at his sudden parting. He nodded nonetheless. “Of course.” They exchanged numbers and Kaneki let Amon keep his promise of paying for the coffee. While doing so, they asked the waitress to pour the rest of their coffee into paper cups.

They exited the café and before the ghoul opened his mouth, Amon spoke. “If it’s fine with you, can I join you in your walk to the subway station? You’re heading there, right? I’m going that direction too.”

It was obvious he’d caught Kaneki off guard. Maybe it was his imagination playing tricks to Amon when he saw pink subtly coloring the ghoul’s pale cheeks, but either way, he couldn’t stop the heat from rising to his face in response. Amon felt confused at both of their reactions. “It’s okay if you refuse.” He awkwardly said, scratching his head when the silence stretched.

“No. It’s okay. We can walk together.” Kaneki finally said.

The walk to the station was in silence, thankfully a comfortable one, despite the awkward moment from before. They were walking side by side, and especially then, Amon noted again how small Kaneki was.

Inside the station, while they waited for the subway, Amon asked, “When do you want to meet?”

Kaneki glanced up at him. “Some time this week sounds fine to me, Amon-san. I’ll send you a message if that’s okay.”

Amon nodded.

After a few minutes, they both heard the sound of the subway getting closer and Kaneki started walking towards the line, along with a couple of people. However, Amon stayed.

Kaneki turned to him. “Amon-san? You’re not coming?”

“No, I... I actually forgot I still needed to do something in this part of the city. Sorry.”

The ghoul blinked. “Oh, okay. Then I’ll see you soon.” The subway arrived and its doors immediately opened. Kaneki bowed his head to him and stepped inside. The doors shut.  

“Goodbye, Kaneki.” Amon said, even though the boy was out of reach.

Or that’s what Amon thought; Kaneki gave him a last smile as if he’d heard him, and then he was gone.

Amon stood there for a few minutes, hands tucked in his pockets, and wondered why in the world he had lied. Twice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh Amon, nobody believed you anyway :) And yet another 'interruption' haha, that had to be done. I have plans for the next couple of chapters! I'm sure I've got a couple of things wrong w/ the whole Kanou/Rize/Ken and what the CCG actually knows. Sorry, it's been a while since I read the manga. 
> 
> Also, I said I would update faster this time but another month went by? Sorry ;w; It's somewhat late now but Happy New Year! As always, thank you so much for reading and for leaving kudos, comments, etc. It means the world to me. 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this chapter <3 Any mistakes, please let me know!
> 
> (In case you were wondering, the book Ken was reading was a gift from Hinami!)


	4. Chapter 4

Kaneki never sent him a message.

Almost two weeks had gone by since their last meeting and the ghoul hadn’t contacted him yet. Amon didn’t know what to make of it; he could shoot him a message himself instead, but for some reason he was reluctant to.

He would wait.

* * *

 

“Take a look at this.” Akira tossed a folder on his desk.

Amon took the folder and lifted his gaze. Akira was leaning against the wall, her arms folded over her chest, waiting for him to look at whatever she had gave him.

Amon opened the folder and scanned its content. It was a report.

Over the last week, several ghoul corpses had been found in different alleyways in the 11th ward. After some brief investigations, it was determined that the marks and hits left on the bodies most likely belonged to a rinkaku ghoul.

“Look at the pictures.” Akira told him. “Doesn’t it ring a bell?”

There were some photographs attached to the report. Amon comprehended why Akira had made that question. The pictures showed the places of the attack; blood was everywhere, some of the bodies missed a limb, whether it was an arm or a leg, others were hardly recognizable at all.

Amon swallowed and looked up at Akira. “And?” She inquired. “It’s exactly the same scene we found at the Ghoul Restaurant. Looks like the ghoul you call Eyepatch decided to come out of hiding after all.”

Not only at the Ghoul Restaurant, but also at Kanou’s lab, Amon thought, but kept quiet. 

“Has this case being assigned already?” Amon asked, eyeing the pictures again. It was definitely Kaneki’s doing. The lack of limbs in some of the corpses was a signal that Kaneki possibly fed from them too. Kaneki had already developed a kakuja. Why he kept doing this was beyond Amon. Was it because he refused to eat human flesh? Or he wanted to keep developing his kagune? Either way, it was dangerous; not only for Kaneki but also for people.

If they paid attention to the kagune type and the missing limbs, it was a matter of time until Akira or someone else made the connection between the Eyepatch ghoul and the Kakuja ghoul they had encountered at Kanou’s lab.

“A few investigations had been done, naturally, but nothing official.” Akira responded, walking to where Amon was seating. “It’s very strange, isn’t it? Why does this ghoul keep murdering its own kind? Is it really cannibalizing?”

“It’s possible,” Amon said, lost in thought. “This place seems very familiar. Is the exact location available?”

“At the end of the last page.” Akira replied, placing a hand over her mouth to stifle a yawn. “Hopefully the higher-ups will assign us this case. Things have been a little boring lately, anyway.”

It was likely they did, Amon thought. Both of them had encountered a similar situation not too long ago and he’d already faced Eyepatch once.

Amon made a sound of agreement. He barely heard when Akira said she was going to fetch a coffee and left the room.

He closed the folder; this was already bringing all kind of unwanted attention on Kaneki. Enough of waiting, he needed to talk to him as soon as possible.

* * *

 

He tried to get in contact with him once more, but he wasn’t responding to any of his messages and when he attempted to call him, it went directly to voicemail.

This was going to be, without a doubt, the most questionable thing he did in a really long time.

Amon grabbed his keys and briefcase and locked the door of his apartment when he stepped out into the calm night.

* * *

 

He was sure he was in the correct place, that’s what the report stated at least. A few streets away from the subway station in the 11th Ward.

It was late. Amon glanced around him, even though he couldn’t see any pedestrians, and headed towards the alleyway.

Amon couldn’t hear anything aside the sound of his own steps; the silence was unsettling. It didn’t seem to be anything strange in the alleyway, nevertheless, he kept walking.

After a while of finding nothing unusual, the rational part of him began to wonder just what the hell he was doing; here, at late hours of the night, in a seemingly deserted alleyway, where a ghoul could appear at any moment. He was just risking his life. And for what exactly? It was true he wanted to speak with Kaneki and tell him to be careful, but deep down Amon knew this particular case wasn’t a priority. After all, a ghoul hunting his own kind wasn’t something serious for the CCG. Strange? Definitely, but not serious. Besides, it seemed like Kaneki had other things in mind. The whole thing was reckless and so unlike him.

The next step he gave made him stop in his tracks. Amon glanced down and saw a dark liquid on the ground. Even with the poor light in the alley he recognized the characteristic color: deep red.

It was blood.

Amon took a look around before crouching down. He ran a finger over the liquid. It wasn’t all that dried, though it wasn’t fresh either. But it was definitely recent. He noted it wasn’t a single stain; a dark, thin line was connected to it, as if the blood had pooled in that spot. He looked further into the darkness, trying to search where the blood was coming from, but couldn’t see anything past a few meters ahead.

His back stretched, senses immediately on guard. He chided himself for missing so easily the penetrating smell of blood.

Amon’s hold on his briefcase tightened and involuntarily gave a step back.

“It certainly is a surprise to find you here, investigator.” The quiet voice came from behind him.

Amon froze for a few seconds and turned around. Shadows obscured his face, but the voice was unmistakably his.

“Kaneki.”

The slender figure got a tad closer. “What are you doing here, Amon-san?” The words were clear, but his voice sounded muffled; he was most likely wearing his mask.

“I was looking for you,” Amon responded.

Kaneki gave more steps towards him, revealing his face, though he couldn’t see his expression because just as Amon thought, he was wearing the eye-patch mask. He was also wearing the same black, tight skin suit he wore at Kanou’s lab. The moonlight was reflecting on his hair.

“Why?” Kaneki answered after a beat.

“I came to warn you. You’re drawing so much attention to yourself. Why are _you_ here? Why are you killing ghouls?”

He shrugged nonchalantly. “They were causing trouble, so I was taking care of the problem.”

The way Kaneki stated that, light and carelessly, startled Amon.

“But more importantly, you shouldn’t be here Amon-san. I appreciate the concern but even if you’re an investigator it isn’t safe for you to be here.”

Amon felt relieved; that sounded more like him. “I’m leaving soon. I only came to tell you that since you weren’t answering my messages and calls.”

Kaneki averted his gaze. “Sorry about that. I’ve been busy lately.”

“Yeah, I can see that.” Kaneki turned to him and Amon could see the amusement in his visible eye.

The ghoul walked towards him in silence. Amon stood still.

Kaneki didn’t say anything when he stood in front of Amon, with almost no space between their bodies. The smaller male glanced up at him.

There was a time when Amon thought Kaneki’s mask was utterly creepy but now that he knew the boy’s face underneath that wide lipless grin, it didn’t give him the same feeling. Though, he wished he was able to see the younger’s expression.

They held each other’s gazes and Amon opened his mouth to say something, but his breath only caught in his throat when Kaneki lifted a hand towards him, to the side of his face, as if he were to touch him.

However, Kaneki’s hand froze mid-air and the calm look in his eye changed too sudden. Before Amon could react, the ghoul shoved him away, with such force he landed on the ground, as his rinkaku was released from his back and his eye turned black and red.

“Wha-”

A tail-like thing descended from somewhere above them to the spot where Kaneki was still standing, but he blocked the attack, shielding himself with his kagune.

“I’m a bit surprised you could detect my presence, Eyepatch.” A brief chuckle.

Standing up, Amon followed the owner of the voice until his gaze landed on a single, dark silhouette standing on the rooftop of the building before them.

“And who’s that? A dove? Really?” The ghoul laughed aloud this time.

“Investigator.” Kaneki called to him in a quiet voice, not taking his eyes from the ghoul on the rooftop. Amon noticed he avoided using his name. “You should get out of here. I don’t doubt your fighting skills but it’s possible there will be more.”

“Oh? Now you’re protecting a fucking dove? A human? After mercilessly murdering your own kind? There’s no doubt you’re full of surprises, Eyepatch.” The ghoul’s mocking tone turned dark and threatening. “Like hell I’m letting the dove escape.”

The figure descended silently, jumping smoothly until he landed in front of them. His face was covered by a plain red mask and he released his kagune; it stretched menacingly. And just as Amon had suspected, it was a bikaku type.

“I wasn’t planning to, ghoul.” Amon said, equally serious. An almost excited smile crept onto his face; it had been a while since he last fought with a ghoul.

“Amon-san,” Kaneki whispered, glancing at him. He sounded worried.

“Remember this is my job, Eyepatch. I can’t let any ghouls live.” Amon emphasized his statement by activating Kura, his quinque.

Kaneki remained silent.

“The moment more of them show up, you leave.” He said at last, the limbs of his rinkaku extending around him, as they stood side by side.

* * *

 

It was clear this ghoul wasn’t the right opponent for them. Not even if Amon was alone.

The ghoul’s breath came in ragged pants and his posture indicated his injured state; he was pressing a hand against his bloodied arm.

On the other hand, both Kaneki and he were barely out of breath.

Kaneki took a step forward. “I think it’s time to eat,” he said in a strange, velvety voice.

Amon’s eyes widened at the words as the ghoul stammered, “Y-you’re fucking crazy.” He attempted to hide his fear, but his voice betrayed him. “This doesn’t end here, Eyepatch.”

His kagune unexpectedly moved, aiming to Amon. The investigator dodged the blow so easily he actually wondered if the ghoul was being serious. It wasn’t until seconds later Amon realized his true intentions.

Knowing Kaneki was going to be distracted by the attack, the ghoul intentionally decided to make Amon his target, and in that split second of distraction, he fled.

Kaneki cursed.

“I’m going after him,” Kaneki told him without waiting for a reply. He disappeared from his sight in less than a second.

“Wait, Kane- Eyepatch!” Amon deactivated his quinque and followed him.

* * *

 

He knew trying to follow Kaneki’s incredibly fast pace was a lost cause, but that didn’t stop him. Not even after the faint sound of their steps ahead vanished completely.

Amon took a moment to catch his breath, asking himself if he wasn’t the one going crazy. He leaned against the nearest wall and looked up at the starless sky. His lips curled up.

What was he even doing? He had no idea.

A loud groan shattered the silence and interrupted his thoughts.

The piercing sound was familiar. “Kaneki,” he whispered.

Amon broke into a run, looking for him.

It wasn’t long before he found him. Kaneki was on the ground, his back was against the wall and his bright hair was cascading over his eyes. He was clutching his stomach hard with both hands. Amon watched as blood seeped from between his fingers and fell on the pavement, staining it. Small grunts escaped from his lips.

Shouldn’t he be regenerating already?

“Kaneki,” Amon called out to him, getting closer.

The younger male laughed bitterly. “H-he really fooled me, uh. That bastar-

A cough accompanied with blood cut off his words.

Amon was immediately to his side, debating internally if he should touch him. Just… He reached for his mask carefully and took it off, putting it aside. His eyes were closed and he was breathing hard; a trail of blood ran down his chin.

The investigator didn’t even ask if he was okay. “Kaneki. Why hasn’t your regeneration started?”

Kaneki opened his eyes. His kakugan had gone away.

“I-it should any moment now. It will be take time until it heals completely, though.”

“Why? You’ve been feeding from ghouls these past days, haven’t you? Shouldn’t it heal fast enough?”

The ghoul looked at him. “I-I have. Just not properly.” He smiled briefly before he coughed again.

Amon would ask him about that later. Now that wasn’t important.

The investigator took off his jacket and held out his arm towards the ghoul as he rolled up the sleeve. “Kaneki.”

Kaneki stared at it in confusion.

Comprehending, he met Amon’s eyes and shook his head firmly. “No.”

“Come on, we don’t have a lot of time. You aren’t healing and we can’t stay here any longer,” Amon said with urgency.

“No,” the ghoul said again, shutting his eyes with force, still shaking his head.

“Kane-“

“Amon-san,” he said, opening his eyes. “Do you really know what you’re trying to do? You, more than anyone, should know how dangerous it is. What if I lose control?”

“You won’t,” Amon replied with conviction.

“How would you know? Ghoul blood isn’t the same as human’s.”

“I know that, but… I trust you, Kaneki.” Amon held his gaze.

The ghoul lowered his eyes and didn’t say anything.

“Please, Kaneki. You keep losing blood, you can’t even stand…”

Kaneki sighed weakly after a moment.

Relief washed over Amon when Kaneki grabbed his arm with both hands and pressed it against his lips. “If I do lose control, don’t even hesitate.”

Amon understood instantly what Kaneki meant.

He was about to reply when he felt the warmth and the sharp pain extending from his arm. Amon gritted his teeth and tried to keep his mind away from the burning feeling. He focused on his breathing.

Amon felt Kaneki’s grip on his arm tighten and among the sucking noises, he heard him make a small sound of satisfaction. The ghoul ran his tongue across the wound, lapping up the blood, and Amon shivered slightly.

Seconds passed and Kaneki didn’t back away, causing Amon to start feeling light-headed. Worried, he tried to move away when unexpectedly, Kaneki loosened the hold on his arm and without a warning, he reached for his neck instead, making him fall backward.

Amon gasped in surprised as Kaneki hastily tried to undo his tie, with no success. He gave up and pulled down his shirt instead to make more space.

The ghoul immediately attached his mouth to the side of Amon’s neck and positioned himself on the investigator’s lap. He didn’t bite down nearly as hard as he had done on his arm despite his desperate actions. It was like Kaneki had come back to his senses.

He sucked lightly on the small wound and sighed softly against Amon’s skin.

“Thank you, Amon-san,” he whispered out of breath, his lips still pressed on his skin, and fell silent. 

He was still against Amon. “Kaneki?” He called.

Kaneki hadn’t exactly eaten but the blood must have somewhat helped him, so Amon was surprised the ghoul fell asleep. Maybe he was too exhausted.

Amon himself sighed but didn’t try to wake him up. Who knows when was the last time he had a proper sleep.

He arranged the slender figure in his arms the best he could so Kaneki’s head rested on his shoulder. He used the jacket to cover Kaneki’s bare back and injury, as well to hide his bloodied arm after making sure his own injury didn't look serious.

Amon stood up slowly, grimacing at the pain coming from his arm.

He grabbed his briefcase and prayed he would find the exit soon.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really tried to write the fight scene but lmao nope, it didn't work. Also writing Amon is hard, help. 
> 
> I'm sorry I'm updating so late. Uni this semester has been hell so I've been really busy with school work ;w; I didn't really have the time to write until now (since I'm on a break). 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I'll try to update soon!


	5. Chapter 5

Kaneki opened his eyes to a dark room, his fingers feeling the soft blanket beneath him.

His head was aching terribly and the lingering taste of blood in his mouth made him squeeze his eyes shut again. Surely he hadn’t… He rolled over onto his side and buried his face into the fluffy pillow. He sighed against the fabric; he would recognize this wonderful scent anywhere.

_Amon._

Just what was the investigator thinking? No, what was _he_ thinking? He shouldn’t have accepted Amon’s help. It had been wrong for so many reasons. Though, he couldn’t deny the taste of the investigator’s blood on his tongue had felt amazing, and even now, just recalling it made his mouth water.

It had been so long since he’d had a taste of human blood. It was nothing like a ghoul’s. 

A part of him felt relieved; if Amon was able to bring him to his place, it meant he wasn’t badly injured, right? But where was he?

Kaneki got up from the bed, his body feeling incredibly heavy, and managed to find the door. He opened it slowly and took a peek outside.

It was a little bit more illuminated there, so it wasn’t hard to find Amon. He could see a dark-haired head resting on the arm of a couch in the middle of –what seemed like- the living room. So, Amon had left him the bed. The realization made his chest feel warm.

He glanced back into the room –Amon’s bedroom- and found a digital clock on the nightstand. It was almost five in the morning. Damn, he had to get back. Tsukiyama and the others would be surely wondering where was he since he’d left the apartment early in the evening the day before. He thought of Hinami; he didn’t want to cause unnecessary worry in the young girl.

Kaneki left Amon’s bedroom, and walked around, trying to make the less noise possible, in an attempt to find the bathroom. When he did, he closed the door quietly before turning on the light. He stared at his reflection in the mirror.

Wow, to say he looked bad was an understatement. With this kind of light, the dark under his eyes stood out more than usual against his pale skin, almost like bruises, and his hair was a mess. He didn’t even bother brush it.

He’d been too focused on his face, so it wasn’t until then that he noticed his clothes. His battle suit had been replaced by a t-shirt that looked more like a dress than anything, since it almost reached his knees. Definitely Amon’s. His legs were bare but at least, he still had his underwear where it should be. Nevertheless, he felt his cheeks burn at the mental image of Amon changing his clothes while he was unconscious.

The half-ghoul lifted the shirt and took a scrutinizing look at his injury. It had healed completely. The only proof that he’d been injured was the fact that part of his stomach had a slightly different color than the rest. 

He washed both his face and mouth. As much as he’d enjoyed the taste of Amon’s blood, he preferred it fresh. Now, he had to something about his clothes. Back in the investigator’s room he didn’t see neither his battle suit nor his mask anywhere.

Kaneki went to the living room again, looking for them in silence. He didn’t want to wake Amon. Not only because it was his fault Amon had stayed up so late outside, but also because he wanted to leave without him knowing. Kaneki still felt ashamed that he’d let Amon feed him. He’d already decided he would leave him a note instead.

After a while of searching unsuccessfully he gave up on trying to find his clothes. He would need to borrow some pants from Amon’s wardrobe and give them back later, along with the shirt. Although, the thought of putting on Amon’s pants made his cheeks heat once again in embarrassment. He was definitely going to look ridiculous in them, even if he wore a belt. Amon was a lot more tall and muscular than him. Still, better than walking around almost naked, Kaneki guessed.

He sighed and started heading towards the bedroom, but stopped halfway. He looked at the figure lying on the couch. Amon had moved in his sleep. There was a little more of light now, slipping through the couple of windows on the other side of the room, so he could see Amon’s features more clearly. He was deeply asleep; his breathing calm and steady. Kaneki glanced at his bandaged arm folded over his bare chest and felt a sting of guilt, knowing he had caused it.

Kaneki walked over to him until he was standing before the older man. A feeling of gratitude came over him suddenly; He didn’t have to, but Amon had helped him once again. He would be lying if he said he wasn’t surprised when he ran into Amon in that place, even more after hearing the reason he was there.

But what happened after that… Kaneki didn’t know why he did that, why he almost touched Amon’s face and why Amon almost let him. If they hadn’t been interrupted by the ghoul, he didn’t know what would’ve happened afterwards. A part of him felt somewhat glad at the interruption.

Kaneki kneeled over the carpet and took his time to study Amon; the slow rise and falling of his chest, the slight flutter beneath his eyelids… Perhaps he was dreaming. He wondered what he was dreaming about. Without really thinking, Kaneki lifted a hand and traced lightly the contours of his face with a single finger, feeling the smooth skin of his cheekbones under his fingertip and going downward. He didn’t stop when he reached his slightly parted lips; they were a little chapped and yet, so soft. He traced them slowly, the warm breath tickling his finger was pleasant. It was true he’d always thought Amon was a handsome man. He’d thought the same of Tsukiyama when he first met him, and yet… That didn’t explain the warmth in his chest he began to feel recently whenever he was with the investigator.

However, if he thought about it, it was kind of similar to the way he felt back then when he’d met Rize. Kaneki froze. Was it really that? Was it attraction what he felt towards Amon? Until then, he’d never been interested that way in many people, let alone men. Though it wasn’t as if he had put much thought into that matter anyway. Even if that was the case and he liked Amon in that _way_ , this wasn’t the time to be thinking about that. He needed to go back to the hideout.

Kaneki meant to back away and continue with his task when Amon suddenly shifted again but didn’t wake up. The movement made Kaneki stop abruptly. Amon had turned his head to his side leaving part of his neck exposed to him. Small but clear marks adorned the investigator’s skin. Kaneki was confused. Had he done that too?

He was pulled from his thoughts when a hand curled around his arm tightly. Kaneki‘s breath hitched in his throat when he glanced up and saw Amon’s dark eyes fixed on him.

The half-ghoul immediately stood up as Amon freed his arm. He stepped away. “I-I’m so sorry, Amon-san. I-”

“Hey, Kaneki, it’s okay. You just took me by surprise,” Amon said, coming to a sitting position, Kaneki deliberately averting his eyes from his naked torso. “I’m sorry as well. I must have scared you.” He gave him an apologetic smile as he tried to brush his hair with a hand, his eyes a little unfocused.

Amon then really _looked_ at Kaneki and the half-ghoul saw his face going red. He followed Amon’s line of sight and it was like he’d die from embarrassment for the third time in less than half an hour.

 “I was looking for my clothes but I didn’t find them anywhere,” he managed to say.

“U-uhm,” Amon cleared his throat. “I had to change your clothes. Sorry for doing that without permission. I was considering throwing your suit away since there was a huge hole on it, but I wanted to ask you first.” The investigator stood up. “The shorts were intact, though. Come, they’re over here,” Amon said as he headed to a room at the end of the hallway. Kaneki followed him, feeling a little awkward.

He waited for Amon outside the room. He took a peek inside and saw a washing machine.

“Here,” Amon said as he came out of the room and gave Kaneki his folded clothes. His mask was resting atop of the pile. “I washed them. Even the mask since it had blood stains.”

Amon was so kind… Kaneki couldn’t help feel again that same pleasant and –now– familiar sensation. “Thank you so much, Amon-san.” He smiled at him.

Amon blinked. “It’s… It was nothing, Kaneki.” He answered after a moment. “You can change in the bathroom.”

The half-ghoul nodded.

* * *

 

Meanwhile Kaneki changed Amon put on new clothes himself and headed to the kitchen to start preparing breakfast. He wondered how he should approach the conversation they had in the café. After all, Kaneki still hadn’t told him what was that ‘reason’ he mentioned.

Kaneki showed up in the kitchen moments later. Amon saw that he’d decided to keep his suit, however, he’d left the shirt over it to cover the hole.

“Thank you, Amon-san,” he said again. “I’ll have to give your shirt back later, though.”

“Don’t worry about that, Kaneki. You take your coffee black, right?”

“Um yeah,” he replied with hesitance. “Amon-san, I’d like to stay but I have to get back. They… They must be wondering where I am.”

“Your friends,” Amon stated. When Kaneki nodded, he continued, “I was hoping we’d pick up our conversation from where we left off, but you’re right, you should definitely go while it’s still a little dark outside.” 

The ghoul looked at him sincerely. “I want to as well.” He started walking to the front door and turned, locking eyes with Amon. “I’ll come back. You have my word.”

Amon believed him.

* * *

 

As soon as he opened the door, something bumped into him. No, not something. _Someone._

“Onii-chan!” Hinami exclaimed, wrapping her thin arms around him and pressing her face against his chest.

“Hi, Hinami-chan,” Kaneki said placing a hand on her head.

When Hinami looked up at him, he noticed her eyes were glassy. “Where were you? You’d never taken more than a few hours.”

Kaneki felt awful. “I’m so sorry, Hinami-chan. Something came up and I couldn’t come back earlier. Sorry for making you worried.”

Hinami shook her head and gave him a big smile. “I’m just happy you’re okay, onii-chan.”

Kaneki returned her smile. “Where are Banjou-san and the others… Hinami?” He asked when she didn’t answer. There was a puzzled look on her face.

“Hina-

“You smell different, onii-chan. More like a…” She paused, frowning.

Kaneki tensed. He’d been so careless; in his rush to get to their hideout as soon as possible, he didn’t consider Amon’s scent would be in him. At least he didn’t forget to take off the shirt before stepping inside. Hopefully Banjou and Tsukiyama wouldn’t be able to detect it right away given that Hinami’s sense of smell was stronger. Either way, he needed to take a shower soon.

Before Hinami could finish, Kaneki heard someone coming downstairs.

“Hinami-chan? Who are you talking to?” Banjou asked.

Hinami stepped away and turned to Banjou when he reached them. “Onii-chan is finally home, Banjou-san.” Hinami said brightly.

“Banjou-san,” Kaneki said, bowing his head. “I’m so sorry for taking so much time.”

Banjou got closer and surprised Kaneki when he put his hand on his shoulder, giving it a gentle but firm squeeze. “Kaneki,” he said softly. “You don’t need to be sorry. We are just glad you were alright all this time.”

Even if both Hinami and Banjou said that, that didn’t make Kaneki feel any less bad.

“They actually gave you a fight this time, didn’t they?” Banjou continued, taking in his damaged suit. Uncharacteristically, the taller ghoul clenched a fist. “I should’ve been there, to guard your back.”

“It’s nothing, Banjou-san.” Kaneki gave him a reassuring smile. “Please, don’t blame yourself.” He started walking towards his room. “I’m going to take a shower.”

While going upstairs, he heard Banjou speak again. “There was something different about him, wasn’t it?” His voice was low, almost a whisper, but Kaneki still could make out the words _._ He didn’t wait to listen to Hinami’s response.

* * *

 

The long shower he took alleviated some of the tension in his muscles. He felt less tired too. Once he got changed, he thought of contacting Tsukiyama. He most likely knew about his disappearance last night.

However, that thought was discarded when he entered the kitchen. Tsukiyama was already there. Hinami was there too, pouring coffee into a mug.

“Kaneki-kun!” Tsukiyama greeted him as usual when he spotted him, glancing up from his cup of coffee. “Are you feeling alright?”

“Tsukiyama-san,” he greeted him back. He blinked. “Yeah, I am.”

 “Onii-chan,” Hinami said. “I called Flower Man when you went upstairs. I promised him I’d call him when you came back.” She handed him the mug.

Kaneki thanked her. He glanced back at Tsukiyama. This was one of the fewer and rare times the ghoul actually had a rather serious expression on his face.

Kaneki was about to say something when the ghoul spoke. “Little Lady. Why don’t you arrange the flowers I brought with me in a vase?”

“Oh, right!” Hinami rushed to the other room. Kaneki watched her go.

“Kaneki-kun.”

“Yes…?” He turned to the other man.

“Where were you last night?”

“Exactly where I told you I’d be,” Kaneki answered.

“But what happened? Why didn’t you come back?”

“A few things happened.” He began to wonder what this was about.

“A few things…” Tsukiyama muttered to himself. “Listen, Kaneki-kun. Last night, while I was out looking for you, I heard something quite… unexpected.”

Kaneki couldn’t help tensing again. “… Unexpected?” He asked as set his cup down on the table.

Tsukiyama lowered his cup to the table, never taking his eyes off him. “You see, apparently the ‘well-known and feared’ Eyepatch ghoul, teamed up with a Dove, nothing less, to fight a ghoul.”

One. Two. Three beats of silence.

“Well?” Tsukiyama inquired when he didn’t say anything.

The distress Kaneki had been feeling up until then was replaced instantly with anger. He snapped. “What the hell? Why are you questioning me?”

“Kaneki-kun, of course it’s not my intention to-

“Or maybe you want me to deny it?”

It was Tsukiyama’s turn to be taken aback. He blinked once. “So it’s true then.” He took a sip of his coffee in silence.  

Kaneki knew Tsukiyama wouldn’t let this go. He considered what he should say about Amon.

He sighed deeply. “I knew that Dove. I fought with him last November. I wasn’t expecting to see him there.”

Tsukiyama was listening intently. He waited for him to continue.

“After that, we talked a few times.” He didn’t mention exactly when. Tsukiyama didn’t need to know that.

“Talk? Why would a Dove want to talk to a ghoul?”

“That time we fought, I could’ve killed him but I didn’t. I let him go.” Now that he thought about it, this was the first time Kaneki talked about that incident with someone.

Tsukiyama kept looking at him, a frown settling between his brows. Kaneki watched as the frown slowly disappeared and a look of realization was evident on his face.

“Kaneki-kun, I think I know who you’re talking about.”

Kaneki was confused. How…?

“When we were looking for you at Kanou’s lab,” Tsukiyama explained, “We encountered a Dove. He was carrying you, unconscious of course. He didn’t even try to fight or anything. He simply left you with us and said he owed you.”

So that’s how it happened, Kaneki thought.

“Yeah. That was him,” he replied quietly. After a moment, he said, “Tsukiyama-san, I know what I’m doing. I would never do something that could put in risk any of your lives.”

But it was true that Tsukiyama didn’t even know about his plan. None of them, actually.

“I’m sure of that. Then? What are you going to do?”

“What do you mean?”

“There’s someone out there spreading the word about this, Kaneki-kun. They’re talking. They won’t forget about a ghoul working together with a Dove against another ghoul any time soon.”

Tsukiyama was right. This wasn’t something ghouls would forget in a matter of days. He’d just said he wasn’t going to risk their lives, but this was exactly what he was doing. He was a well-known ghoul. If someone followed him to their hideout, he’d be blatantly bringing danger right into their doorstep. Just what he’d done?

He should’ve killed that ghoul when he had the opportunity to.

“I’ll take care of it.” He told Tsukiyama. But in the back of his mind, he knew it would be pointless. The damage was already done. And it was his fault. Still, he’d find the ghoul. Not only his friends’ safety was at risk, Amon’s was too. If that encounter ever reached the CCG’s ears…

“Tsukiyama-san,” Kaneki called the other man. “Can you fix my battle suit?”

Tsukiyama didn’t even ask what happened to it. “Leave it to me, mon cher! But I’ll go with you. A man can’t step into the battle field without his sword, can he?”

Kaneki almost rolled his eyes but agreed. “We leave tonight. And Tsukiyama-san? I’m sorry. It wasn’t right to lash out at you.”

“None of that, Kaneki-kun,” Tsukiyama said, swaying a hand. “I understand your frustration.”

Almost immediately, Tsukiyama got to his feet. “Well, I’ve got work to do. Let’s see how damaged the suit is…” His voice vanishing as he went to the living room.

Kaneki took his coffee with him and followed the ghoul.

* * *

 

What was he doing here?

Kaneki looked up at the night sky, dark clouds were hovering over him. He recalled his last conversation with Tsukiyama.

_“Are you sure, Kaneki-kun?” Tsukiyama looked concerned, first at him, then at the bag clutched in his hand. Despite Tsukiyama’s lies in the past, Kaneki could tell the feeling was genuine._

_They were outside the hideout, both with blood stains on their clothes and disheveled hair. Thankfully, hunting that ghoul hadn’t taken a lot of time, even if other ghouls had showed up. This time, Kaneki had made sure to eat until he felt satisfied._

_“Yes.” He told him, not a single hint of doubt in his voice. “It’ll only be for a few days, until things calm down a bit. You don’t have to worry.”_

_Tsukiyama’s eyebrows were still slightly pulled together in doubt._

_“Tsukiyama-san,” Kaneki continued. “The last thing I want is to lead someone to this place.”_

_At that, Tsukiyama couldn’t refuse. “Then I’ll go with you. You can even stay-_

_“I want you to stay here, Tsukiyama-san. In case anything happens,” Kaneki said, since he was sure Tsukiyama was about to suggest staying in his apartment. “But can I count on you?” It had taken a while, but somewhere along the way, he felt like he could start trusting Tsukiyama again._

_“Of course, Kaneki-kun,” Tsukiyama answered, serious and determined, placing a hand over his heart. “But where will you stay?”_

_“Don’t worry, I still have my old apartment. I’ll be careful and I’ll make sure to let you know I’m fine.”_

_Tsukiyama sighed. “Alright, Kaneki-kun. But promise me you will. I’ll have to think of what to tell Banjoi and the Little Lady.”_

_“It’s Banjou.” Kaneki smiled tiredly at him. “I’m sure you will think of something. Thank you, Tsukiyama-san.”_

To his credit, he’d really intended to head to his apartment. But before he could even make it to the 20th Ward, his feet seemed to move on their own towards a different direction, and he ended up outside Amon’s apartment complex. Or to be more precise, on his balcony.

He wondered what he was thinking. But deep down, he knew the answer. He wanted to see Amon again. He wanted to talk to him and make sure he was okay. And perhaps this wasn’t a terrible idea. If he stayed close to Amon, he would make sure to protect him if someone decided to attack him. Kaneki didn’t know if someone had followed them the day before. Not that Amon needed any protection, but he wouldn’t forgive himself if something happened to the investigator because of him.  

With that in mind, he finally stood up from where he was seated. He prayed the sliding door wasn’t locked. But what were the chances? He should’ve just rang the bell in the front door like a normal person. But what normal person would call to anyone’s door at 3 am?

To his surprise, in the first try the door slid smoothly with the minimum effort. He blinked and stepped in. For once, he was glad for Amon’s mistake. But really, he would need to tell him to be more careful-

He heard it before he even had the chance to react.

The crash sounded so loud in his ears.

_Well, shit._

Kaneki looked behind him and saw the broken pieces on the ground. One of the straps of the bag he was carrying must have got caught in what seemed a small figurine. He wanted to laugh. So much for not bothering Amon.

He sighed and dropped the bag, starting to collect the bigger pieces in silence, hoping Amon was a heavy sleeper.

Of course he wasn’t. He heard the sound of the light switch one second and the next the room was illuminated. He stilled before he muttered a curse under his breath.

“Kaneki?” Amon asked with confusion.

He looked at Amon like a deer caught in headlights, feeling the tip of his ears go a deep red.

“I-I’m so sorry, Amon-san.” He stood up quickly. “I’m really sorry for breaking into your apartment like this and for breaking your… uh” He glanced down at his hand and recognized a pointy ear and painted whiskers, “Cat,” He finished, and to make it worse, he finally took in Amon’s appearance. So, he usually went to bed shirtless… He forced himself to tear his gaze away from Amon’s bare chest.

A few seconds of awkward silence went by, and it took everything Kaneki had to not turn around and disappear from the same door he went in. Finally, Amon reacted, and it was the last thing Kaneki thought he would see from Amon in a situation like this. The investigator tried to conceal it behind a hand, but it was pointless; the deep sound of his laugh carried through the small room until it reached his sensitive ears.

Wide-eyed, Kaneki stared in wonder at Amon, at the faint crinkles that formed around his eyes. He felt himself smile at the sound of Amon’s laugh, but to his disappointment it was over too soon. He wanted to hear more of it.

“I’m sorry Kaneki,” Amon apologized, coughing once. “I didn’t mean to laugh. You just looked really…” Amon hesitated.

“Silly? Ridiculous? Stupid? I don’t blame you for thinking-

“Adorable,” Amon blurted out. “I thought you looked adorable,” he repeated, slower this time. He scratched his head, his cheeks going a soft pink.

The half-ghoul didn’t even try to stop the blush from spreading openly on his face. Kaneki felt his lips part in clear surprise at Amon’s words. The investigator continued, “Come on, leave that. I’ll clean it in the morning. It’s late, we should go to sleep.”

The half-ghoul looked at him with astonishment. “You won’t ask why I’m here? You don’t want to know?”

“I do want to know. But I won’t pressure you on telling me.” Amon walked past him and closed the sliding door, locking it up. Kaneki could feel the warmth radiating off Amon’s body. “You can tell me tomorrow. We should rest for now.”

Kaneki felt the need to apologize again. “I’m sorry, Amon-san. Sorry for bothering you,” he said quietly, looking at anything but him.

A hand was suddenly on top of his head, stroking his white locks slowly, gently. “No more apologies, alright?”

Kaneki felt shivers all over his body and resisted the urge to lean into his touch. He only nodded as Amon guided him into his apartment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So um, I'm not dead haha. oh my god. I'm sorry for the super late update. Uni and my lack of my motivation killed me. Uni is still killing me, though :'D also ik there wasn't a lot of Amoneki on this ch but i'll try to make up for that in the next one (even more now that those two live together :^))
> 
> It will take a while, but I do have the intention of finishing this fic so, I apologize in advance for the (most likely) sporadic updates. As always, if you spot any mistakes please tell me. 
> 
> Thank u for reading <3


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